Snippets and photos to nourish the soul.
You know what's even harder than forgiving others? Forgiving ourselves.
You know that thing that runs through your head like a broken record, how you should have said or done something differently?
Sometimes we wear our shame like a comforting blanket and it can be hard to let it go. Shame can feel familiar, like on old friend. So forgiving ourselves can be hard and take courage.
How would things be different if you forgave yourself?
FOMO is real. Lately I have been having many conversations with friends, colleagues, and clients alike about the effects of Instagram on all of us. Even if we KNOW that rationally we cannot see everything behind a photo, Instagram is taking it's toll.
They say a picture says a thousand words, when you look at this picture, what do you see? You may see just a beautiful photo OR you might make assumptions, it could stir up insecurity, envy or any number of things. Whatever is going on for us, along with the values of the culture (like finding and living our "passion") we can project onto a photo.
This looks like a paradise right? Let's demystify and break down what's behind the scenes here.
This was a beautiful spot AND
What you can't see is the 40 degree sweaty crawl which I did to get here with bronchitis during smoky peak forest fire season, while arguing with my partner. Also the meltdown I had when we arrived when my inner 4 year old came out in full swing.
The unbearable swarms of mosquitoes and black flies- so much that we could not stay still outside for more than a few minutes are also invisible.
We need to use our social media more consciously. Many of us are using it for business and marketing. Social media accounts and business are so entangled that it can feel like we are trapped. Like our social media is using us instead of the other way around! Let's keep the healthy social media convo going.
PS Sign up for my newsletter to receive a free digital detox download!
Your Pain is Valid
So many of us minimize our pain. "So and so has it worse than me" we say. "I shouldn’t complain." "There are homeless people addicted to crack, there are starving children in Africa."
Your pain is real and valid.
There is enough suffering and pain to go around, you acknowledging yours, is not taking away the right to pain and suffering of others.
So why acknowledge that your pain is valid? It takes the layer of shame we place on-top of our suffering away. That is half the battle.
What a relief! To be able to feel what we feel without self judgement and criticism!
The Brighter the Light the Darker the Shadow
Spiritual bypassing is a thing. Really.🙏
Spiritual practice can be powerful and important to our wellbeing. It can give meaning and purpose, and a connection to something more than mundane reality. 📿
It can be tempting to side step our "stuff", with our practices and spiritual beliefs, and often it can happen unconsciously. Without tending to our darker parts our muck gets repressed and can come out in other ways that harm both ourselves and others. 🖤
The brighter the light, the darker the shadow. 🌘
**Definition from Wikipedia ;)
I see this sign almost daily on my commute to the office. A bright and beautiful reminder to be empathetic towards ourselves and others
It is easy to fall into patterns of advice giving, pity, and judgement.
Unlike fixing, pity, and judgement -empathy allows space to feel what we feel and experience what we experience with compassion for ourselves and others
The Ultimate Paradox
What are you severing of yourself to fit it?
Big question right? From our early years we long to fit in, often continuing into adult hood, causing us so much suffering and the question of "what's wrong with me?" or a general sense of unworthiness.
The bad news is: the quest to fit in is unending there will always be that thirst that cannot be quenched in the striving to belong.
The good news is: The liberation and belonging felt in letting the striving to fit in go.
To all the chronic "sorry!" sayers, you know who you are ;)
We do not need to apologize. Apologizing for things and people and situations that are not our responsibility can have undertones of apologizing for our existence. You are worthy, no apologies.
Somewhere along the way we internalized that we are at fault, or that saying sorry was a way we kept the peace, or helped us cope or survive in some way.
See if you can notice when you have the urge to say "sorry!" And be with the discomfort no matter how uncomfortable. When we do this we stop minimizing ourselves and start claiming our space in the world.
Fill Your Cup!
Enough with trying to fill other cups from an empty, depleted cup. That just leads to resentment, anger, guilt, shame, and burnout.
Fill your cup first so your cup can overflow and fill other cups.
Nature does not Hurry
Thank you morning tea for this reminder!
Get off the Treadmill
Ever feel like you're a hamster on the hamster wheel of life? Or on a treadmill that keeps getting faster and faster?!
What do you keep piling on your plate? What beliefs do you have that contribute to the treadmill getting faster? Often the beliefs go something like this: What I do and how much I do determines my worth or I don't have enough, I need more. Enough money, enough things, enough experiences. And in this culture of frenetic doing- it is hard to get off the treadmill, let alone realize that we are on it, and have a choice to get off!
Often we are addicted to the treadmill. What would we DO if we had more time and space? What parts of ourselves would appear? If you are to know your Self, to listen to your inner compass, quieting the busyness is so important. Most of us have a choice to be on the treadmill. How will you get off of it?
Wabi-Sabi Wabi-Sabi Wabi-Sabi
Yes Wabi Sabi! Not only is wabi sabi fun to say but also a profound teaching that we can learn a lot from.
Wabi Sabi is the Japanese art in finding beauty in imperfection.
As Lenard Cohen says: There is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in.
How do you talk to yourself? What is your inner dialogue? Often we are barely conscious of what we tell ourselves, and often our inner dialogue goes something like this: I am not good enough, why would they ever like me?, I don't deserve this, I shouldn't have said that, I should be thinner, more muscular, I don't like my hips etc etc etc etc.
What if we spoke to ourselves like we would a friend? With the respect and kindness, and understanding that we offer our besties? Seriously. Try it. See what changes, it might feel strange and that is normal, if we keep at it we begin to forgive ourselves, to be more gentle with ourselves, to like ourselves more and more.
What a Journey
My journey with yoga has been a journey!
This photo is a flashback to India, just after my yoga teacher training. I returned refreshed, inspired, and so uprooted connected to the transcendent that I lost footing on this earth, yearning to transcend higher. I threw myself into the teachings, and I taught for years before I realized how disconnected I was from this earth, from being human in this world. I needed roots.
Since this realization I stepped away - a 4 year hiatus from teaching and studying yoga. I have grown roots into my nutrient rich muck, shadow, darkness and with this I return integrated with my feet on the ground, rooted in my practice and my teaching.
I continue on my yoga journey, with gratitude for all that I have learnt and welcome teachings yet to come!
Speak Your Truth
Vulnerability is where it's at! Really! If you don't believe me, check out the link to Brene Brown's Ted Talk, The power of vulnerability ->> http://ow.ly/eJi730kHyKi
The more your voice shakes the better, let the tears flow, whatever you need to do- research shows that vulnerability creates genuine connection.
It's a paradox right? Usually we feel shame about some part of ourselves and try to hide that part away in attempt to build connection and be liked. Nope.
It's vulnerability that is the connecting factor! So go ahead and speak your truth, especially if your voice shakes!
We often believe that we don't have a right to say no. It has been shoved down our throats that we need to put everything and everyone before our own needs.
Say no more! Say "no" more. Exercise your right to say no
Meet yourself where you are at, wherever that may be, whether that is anger, discomfort, joy.
See if you can allow your experience without judging it and placing a layer of shame or guilt on top of it. Create space for yourself.
Enlightened Bathroom Graffiti
Let Yourself be Seen
Make mistakes, speak what feels true, be vulnerable even if your voice and body shakes, especially if your voice and body shakes. Let yourself be seen.
Get to know your Self
Yoga is the Journey of the self, Through the self, to the Self.
Often it can be misinterpreted as a transcending the self, an upward splitting from the Wasteland of the self and the world.
Not so. Yoga is the journey downwards into ourselves, into the muck, through the muck, to our true Selves.
"Many take the path well worn , but they are only given a half-lived life. To those willing to brave the unknown path, the dark thicket, a remembering of love, magic, and purpose returns." -Toko-Pa Turner from her book Belonging
You don't have to Believe Everything you Think
You don't have to believe everything you think. In fact believing everything you think can be dangerous! Question what the monkeys in your mind are telling you.
Office Plant Friends
Yesterday i was playing with and trying to hold paradox in relationship to mountain.
Can I drop the pressure to push myself, and connect with the sound and feel of the snow.
Can I hold the corporate dominance and see the trees?
Can I connect with the mystic mountains shrouded in cloud despite the tension of the opposites within myself? The want to be in nature, the want to go to bed. The burgois feel of the socio economic pigeonholing of the slopes, my part in participating in it.
Where are you Working too Hard?
I'm not talking about actual employment. Or your busy schedule. Nope. I'm talking about thinking, analyzing, taking on responsibility of emotions and states of being that aren't yours.
Within our busy schedules, our relationships, our work. Can we find rest in our own experience, letting other people have their emotions and their experience.
Feel like your JUST holding it together? Like you're working 150% and still it's not enough? You are not alone friends. This is an epidemic.
Where can you loosen your choke-hold on your expectations of yourself and others to give yourself more space within the busy schedules and the relationships?
Nature as Medicine
In an over scheduled, productivity obsessed culture, we find ourselves gasping for the inhales. It can be hard to breathe.
Can we allow ourselves to exhale?
You're doing it anyway, see if you can place your attention on your exhale. Now breathe it all the way to the end.
Try making it a little longer than the inhale.
How does it feel in your body?
I Would Rather be Whole than Good
There is a sacrifice of goodness for wholeness. Paradoxically the more whole we feel, the more good it feels!
Less Doing More Being
It is OK to do less, even if the culture is telling you to do more, to make more money, and see more things.
It's ok and even radical, to believe that you are enough and have enough. To choose you. And to choose to do things at your own time.
It is ok to be ok
Not Just for Hippies
What!? you say. I'm serious. And this is not some "I should be grateful for.." mumbo jumbo. Let's put the "I really should be grateful" aside for now.
When we are in a pit full of darkness. Gratitude can be a bar that we hold onto to keep us from becoming consumed. It can be a daily practice that brings us back into the present. Feel those feet on the ground? Awesome. I have feet. grateful. These feet are connected to legs? Two legs? Awesome. Gratitude. Going to make coffee. Farmers who picked the beans, truckers who drove the beans, pilot who flew the beans, people who made the French press, clean water to go in the kettle.. you get the idea!
Gratitude AND it is important to allow yourself to feel dark feelings too. You don't have to be grateful for everything. You should not be grateful for everything.
Experiment with it, see what gratitude can do for you today, how the feeling tone shifts when we start to notice the little things that aren't so little after all.